There are only two distinguishing characteristics of The Colony , in select theaters today : 1 ) snow and 2 ) cannibalism . But it ’s really the cannibalism where The Colony gets genuinely unique . And by unequalled , I intend farcical . Spoilers ahead …
Apparently The Colony is one Canadian production company ’s endeavour to prove to studios that Canada can make big - budget action mechanism movies at a fraction of the cost . They are successful in that regard ; The Colony is in fact a movie . And that ’s passably much all you could say for it .
Taking a handful of the most clichéd clichés in the post - apocalyptic genre , The Colony is dress 20 or so class after the macrocosm has frozen over , and masses survive in small — wait for it — colonies that are mostly surreptitious and look uncannily like the cellar of large department stores . All the standards are there : A hard but good - hearted loss leader toy by Laurence Fishburne , an asshole who is inexplicably second - in - command despite his penchant for disregard the rules and kill citizenry played ( as usual ) by Bill Paxton , a flavorless , skillful - looking lead with a mysterious past who is somehow in kick of lay aside the survivors by the oddment of the motion-picture show from the menace that has been wake up .
When The Colony receives a hurt call from The Other Colony , our bland protagonist , Laurence Fishburne and a young man whose desire for adventure outweighs his braveness and whom I ’ll call Expendable Lad set out for 20 foresightful mo of on - filmdom walk through the blow ( Laurence leaves Bland ’s vernal lady friend in charge of The Colony , to make it sluttish for Paxton to present his inevitable coup d’etat while they ’re gone ) .
The movie ’s snowy exteriors seem less like an effort to portray hauntingly beautiful CG vistas or present a terrific coup d’oeil at how we might be jeopardize our planet and more a cheap way to use greenscreen . Actually , the whole movie feels like a more or less above budget Doctor Who two - parter , peculiarly since 95 % of the film takes place in small , nondescript curing .
When the chemical group arrive at The Other Colony — and I should point out that they ’ve pick up this distress call after a mere week of silence — they are rather perturb to discover the Other Colonists have all been feed by “ cannibals . ” I put cannibals in quotes ( and I used melodic phrase quotes when I type too , FYI ) because The Colony seems to have a very foreign idea of what cannibalism is . I admit I ’m not an expert on the subject , but I ’m pretty sure eating human form does n’t 1 ) render you incapable of delivery , 2 ) sharpen your teeth into fang , 3 ) make you impervious to damage such as smoke , and 4 ) remove you of all noetic thought . I ’m definitely certain that even the hungriest cannibals would probably just start eating each other as opposed to spend the time to run down the the great unwashed in a whole second Colony several knot away , in the coke , over a bridge that Laurence Fishburne sacrifice himself to bollocks up up . Seriously , when Bland first regard the anthropophagus , they ’re in a big rapscallion pile of about 40 people — it ’s like they ’re already sit in a massive , gimcrack Ryan ’s Steakhouse snack counter . So why are the cannibal so pit bent on driving across town to get to Arby ’s ?
But gaping plot of land - holes are n’t The Colony ’s worst problem . The Colony is a movie in the most technical sense of the Word of God , but it lacks anything a movie involve to be entertaining . Interesting characters . Amusing dialog . An immersive setting . A fascinating scoundrel . Cool special effects . A way to conk the clip in - between expositive dialog that is n’t minute of Laurence Fishburne walk in a greenscreened wintertime wonderland . Anything that you could somehow frankly describe as “ better than all right . ”
But The Colony is a movie . It definitely has that going for it .
Laurence FishburneMovies
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