We ’re not due for our biennialDeluxe Comfort Girlfriend Body Pillowupdate for another 14 months , but chop-chop evolving events in the girlfriend organic structure pillow populace have force our hand . Things are different now . Here is what we know .
A Pricier Pillow
The original Deluxe Comfort Girlfriend Body Pillow , despite continuing to defy all decency and human physiology , has more than triple in price within the last 10 calendar month . A lurid addition , give that it was only $ 10 two and a half years ago .
While the Deluxe Comfort Girlfriend Body Pillow now retails at a perversely arbitrary $ 39.15 , you could , as always , cull one up todayfrom Sears ( ! ) for an as arbitrary $ 27.55 , peradventure as part of the Sears Labor Day gala , or possibly because the sales price is determined by jerk yield fly at a dusty TI-82 graphing calculator and seeing where they land .
It ’s not clear what prompted the escalation in Deluxe Comfort Girlfriend Body Pillow pricing . We are certain , though , that it is still an incomprehensibly sad place to rest your oral sex . And we ’re still not certain why it ’s wearing a dishwashing mitt .
Dudes Now
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wig0otzt_PY
While the Boyfriend Body Pillow has been around for several years , it has only late ( e.g. sometime since last October , I do n’t recognise , I do n’t have that page bookmarked , I ’m not a monster ) link the Deluxe Comfort Girlfriend Body Pillowat Sears . It costs $ 34.95 , which is either less or more expensive than its distaff compatriot , depend on how long that sales agreement hold up . It issue forth in four colors :
They are all dressed like bros debating whether it ’s worth walking down to the tailboard or if they should just slam some beer at home .
You ’ll notice also that each has a pocket , in case you want your felt quarter - military personnel to double as coin storage or possibly give him a sack square , and no kitchen baseball mitt , which makes it feel significantly less like he is go to seek to chop you up and dispose of your remains in a wood chipper .
And This Thing, I Don’t Even
For some of you lonelyhearts , the idea of arrange your face on bogus knocker is totally likable , but give birth to deal with the torso , the sleeve , the manus , etc . just feel too much like dedication , you know ? Surprise ! You ’re a sociopath . Here is the Deluxe Comfort Girlfriend – Breast Pillow , another thing you’re able to buy , at Sears , today :
The ware description believably explain it better than I could :
Breast Friend Pillow Black – The Breast Friend Pillow promises a comfortable sopor for bachelors or boyfriends who are drop their girlfriend . Lay your head on your girlfriend ’s chest . cushy plush pillow come complete with pink or black shirt . large for unmarried man parties or actually quite functional for reading in bed . Great gag talent !
Actually quite functional . Great gag gift . “ miss ” their “ girlfriends . ” This is a thing that live in the same earth that you and I occupy . It retails for $ 32.95 , which , yes , mean that just the titty are valued more highly than the breasts and trunk and arm during the Sears Labor Day Blowout .
This has been your biennial postulate - by - issue - outside - of - our - control Deluxe Comfort Girlfriend Body Pillow Update .
https://gizmodo.com/girlfriend-body-pillow-update-now-12-still-terribly-5954322
Pillows
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